Many of us grew up with the conceit that talking about money is rude, and sadly, that thinking persists in American culture. A new survey by Empower found that money talk remains highly taboo. The survey found that 62% don’t talk about money — not with their family (63%), not with their friends (75%), and not even with their spouse/partner (46%).
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People would rather discuss other potentially flammable topics instead, like politics (43%) and, more morbidly, death (32%), than their finances, according to the survey.
So what’s the hang-up over talking about money? Why does it make us so uncomfortable?
Protectiveness Over Social Status Perception
According to Brad Klontz, CFP, founder of the Financial Psychology Institute, on a blog by Northwestern Mutual, people may be disinclined to talk about money because they feel vigilant and protective over their social status.
“Money is very tightly linked to our status,” Klontz said. “We like to disparage the whole idea of people trying to show status, but it’s an ingrained human characteristic. Your concern over your status is one of the reasons you’re alive right now, because your ancestors passed this onto you.”
Fear of Judgment
Klontz went on to explain that fear of being judged is also one hangup holding people back from talking about money.
“Either I’m worried you’re not going to like me because I have too little, or you’re going to judge me because I have more than you,” Klontz told Northwestern Mutual. “So we’re very hyper-aware of how other people might be looking at us around money.”
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As noted, many of us grew up without money being plainly and comfortably talked about in the home. We may have also inherited what Klontz calls “money scripts”, i.e., the concept that talking about money is inappropriate. These money scripts get further ingrained in your psyche as you age, and unless you are actively working to change them, they only further shut the door to money talks.
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The stigma around talking about money does appear to be fading, fortunately. Empower’s survey found that millennials (56%) and Gen Z (49%) are more willing to talk about money topics than older generations (38% Gen X and 22% Boomers), and twice as likely to say they’re an “open book” (28% versus 13%).
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This article originally appeared on GOBankingRates.com: New Study Shows Majority of Americans Are Uncomfortable Talking About Finances
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